Friendship Therapy & Coaching

Therapy…for your friendships…

Yes, for your friendships. If you have difficulty in making or maintaining healthy friendships,
you are not alone.

This isn’t something that gets talked about enough and my work is normalizing that therapy for your friendships is a really good and kind thing. 

Here are a few common problems in friendships that often come up in therapy: 

  • Going to college and feeling like you don’t connect with anyone quickly

  • Moving to different cities and navigating being long distance friends for the first time

  • Being the last single one in your friend group and not feeling like you have anything in common anymore

  • Being the first of your friends to have kids and feeling really isolated

  • Going through infertility or loss amidst a sea of all of your friends getting pregnant with “ease”

  • Feeling like you’ve changed a lot and your friend has stayed the same

  • Navigating the death of a loved one and feeling a lot of distance from your friends

Not having a normalized space to talk through this can make you feel like you’re the only one or there’s something wrong with you. That is not the case. Experiencing difficulties or hurt from a friend can be heartbreaking. 

On the other hand, thriving friendships can be one of the key pillars to a long, healthy life. An 85 year study known as the Harvard Study of Adult development has tracked hundreds of folks across their lifespan, studying what factors contributed to their personal health and happiness. One thing that was consistent and clear in the research: good, close, and connected relationships are the most important factor for your mental-health, your physical health, and your overall happiness. 

So, instead of wondering why you need help with your friendships, why not get help with them?!

Friendship Therapy with Blake Blankenbecler Licensed Counselor

Here are a few things we often work on in
friendship therapy:

  • Taking the time to honor your stories of harm and hurt from friendships

  • Exploring how the past is at play in your present day friendships

  • Getting curious about how friendships were valued or devalued by your family, especially looking at what you were taught about friendships

  • Paying special attention to what’s happening in your body when you talk about certain friends (your nervous system is always giving you wisdom and insight about what it’s like to be you with other people, fun fact) 

  • A safe space to talk through and face the ways you may have caused harm in your friendships 

  • Inviting you to consider new ways of showing up in your friendships (hi boundaries!) that are more honest, more authentic, and allow you to bring your full self to the table

In a society that devalues the importance of friendships, you choosing to look at them and explore ways that you’ve been harmed and ways that you might hide, avoid, or people please is quite profound. Going to therapy for your friendships is brave, kind, and pretty revolutionary- and we are here to support you on your journey towards becoming a better friend and having better friendships. 

If you sense you could use some therapeutic care for your friendships, reach out to schedule a free 15-20 minute phone consult to see if friendship therapy is something you could benefit from. 

I also offer friendship therapy for you and your friend. Think couples therapy, only you and your friend are the clients. This is typically short term work where you both come in for a few sessions to explore your friendship story. You are both invited to engage the places of hurt, confusion, and disconnection in your friendships and work towards finding healing and repair.

In person sessions are available in Charlotte, North Carolina and virtual sessions are available to anyone living in North Carolina, South Carolina, or Texas.

For more resources on friendship, check out The Friendship Deck, a game for friends who are craving more depth and intimacy with each other created by Blake Blankenbecler, LCMHC. You can learn more about her friendship work here.

Founder of Fig Holistic Psychotherapy, Blake Blankenbecler, LCMHC didn’t have any great resources to offer clients or friends when it came to deepening friendships, so she took it upon herself to create the thing she needed, which came to be THE FRIENDSHIP DECK, a conversation game for friends who are craving more depth and intimacy with each other with three deepening levels to help you and your friends enjoy nourishing friendships that stand the test of time!